


Memories

by Knowmefirst



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Light Angst, M/M, POV First Person
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-09
Updated: 2017-03-09
Packaged: 2018-10-01 17:17:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,030
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10194779
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Knowmefirst/pseuds/Knowmefirst
Summary: This story is about what's left behind and the things that bring memories to those who love them.





	

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this fiction in memory of my grandpa, for everything you show me and teach me without knowing. I will miss you very much grandpa <3
> 
> Beta by the lovely and wonderful Syd, any other error are all mine.

_My Dear Evline,_

_They say that the most perfect memorable moments in life are when something beautiful and happy happens. These things don’t have to be life changing. In that moment it was perfect, and they don’t even have to be big things. For me there were many things, like watching grandpa Dean work on his 67' Chevy Impala , its black coat still shinning after all this years. When I was five, I found the initials of grandpa and Uncle Sam, and while grandpa cleaned the car from the inside singing to old cassette songs, I traced the letters with my index finger as I said them aloud._

_Other memories consisted of watching grandpa Cas cook. Sometimes I would quietly sit at the table watching grandpa as he measure the ingredients to make bread for that day’s dinner; sometimes I would ask questions, but most of the time I would sit there quietly watching. Grandpa Dean would sometimes come into the kitchen and say that when I was like that I reminded him of grandpa Cas. He would smile as he bopped my nose with a dirty finger, leaving an oil stain behind. In those moments grandpa Cas would look at me and smile, blue eyes shining as if he knew something no one else knew, and reach across the table and wipe the oil residue that was still on my nose._

_Uncle Sam gave me his love for books and knowledge. Grandpa Dean would sometimes bemoan that Uncle Sam was the reason that I was such a nerd, but secretly I love knowing that I had that in common with my uncle. Whenever I got up in the middle of the night, I would find Uncle Sam sitting in the library, a book in his hands and glasses perched on the edge of his nose. On those days, Uncle Sam would move his book to the side and beckon me to come forward. I would sit there listening to him read aloud before falling sleep tucked next to him, and the last thing I would hear was his voice._

_The funny thing is that all those memories sometimes are forgotten until something sparks them to life and it's like they come rushing back to me. Anything can make them come. For me, it was watching each of the men I grew up with pass away; and it wasn’t until that moment that these memories came flooding back to me. Some memories are remembered right away because they’re things that happened often, like when I used to ride in grandpa’s car with the windows down, air rushing through my hair as I played in the backseat with my toy car. While grandpa drove, drumming his hands to the beat of the music and singing aloud, smiling whenever he would look at me through the review mirror._

_I sometimes wished that I had these kind of memories from my own dad, but he wasn’t that lucky. I lost my parents when I was nine months old in a car accident. I used to ask grandpa Dean about my parents, but whenever I did, grandpa would get this sad look about him. When I was little I never understood why, but it wasn’t until I was much older that I understood that my dad had been grandpa’s Dean only child; a child he never knew about. However, even if I wished that I would have similar memories of my own parents, I wouldn’t change growing up with these men._

_Each of them showed me so much and made me the man I am today. From my grandpa Dean I learned that beautiful things can be found anywhere if only I was willing to see them. From grandpa Cas I learned that even the smallest things are worthy of my attention, and from uncle I learned that a book can teach me how to take care of them if only I stopped to search for it. All of these things are memories and learnings that I cherish to this day. Now that I am a parent myself, I have realized that those are the same memories and teachings I have been showing you without me even realizing it._

_I was even showing you the little quirks that I hadn’t even known I had picked up, until I saw you doing them. The tilt of your head that reminded me of grandpa Cas...the puppy eyes that was all Uncles Sam...but the one that always made me smile was the mischievous quirk to your lips which was all grandpa Dean’s. Of course, not all were nice quirks. I have also passed those dumb sayings that grandpa Dean used to love saying that drove every one crazy, but yet I didn’t mind even if some were not appropriate for a five-year-old._

_I have also found out that smells can trigger memories: the smell of an old book reminded me of Uncle Sam as he would walk back and forth talking to me about something interesting he found that day in one of his many books. The smell of oil would remind me of grandpa Dean as they both leaned inside the hood and he explained what each thing was and did. The smell of flour would remind me of grandpa Cas, specially of the day that I was helping him to bake a cake as a surprise for Uncle Sam and I ended up turning on the hand held mixer and making a mess with the flour._

_However, what I cherish the most was that these men did for me; they raised me, sheltered me, taught me so much...and each of them loved me unconditionally. Maybe they weren’t perfect and a lot of errors were made while I was being raised, but the teachings and memories they left behind is what made everything at the end worth it and special. So, I leave you with the same teachings and memories that were left to me. Maybe they weren't perfect, and neither am I...and more than a few times we fought. But know this, Evline: I will never stop loving you._

_Love,_  
Dad  



End file.
